Challenge: A wall of fear

My original tribe, Rotu, had been on the island for 48 hours. We had no water, but no one was doing anything about it. I jumped to judgments, thinking I was above my tribemates. Rather than trying to understand what was happening, I ordered them around. “We need fire to boil the water,” I barked.

They confronted my bravado head-on. “What’s your problem?” they asked. “Are you scared?” They were genuinely concerned, but I couldn’t see that. I was blocking my emotions.

While I was away from camp briefly, my tribemates made a fire without my help. When I came back and saw it, I cried. I felt sad, tender, weak, relieved — but no longer afraid and angry.

My tribemate John said, “If I had known I was going to get this reaction from you, I would have made the fire sooner.” The rest of the tribe literally swarmed over me and embraced me, too.

I broke through layers and layers of internal walls at once. For the first time in my life, being vulnerable brought me a positive response. It was a watershed.

Key message: Feel your feelings

The Next Challenge: Perspective

Understanding your fears is part of The Real Foundation's five-step process.